A wise person once admonished us not to wait for a holiday to enjoy life.
That may be easy advice to follow for those who are still young at heart and in body, but much more difficult for those whose bodies have begun to show the years of wear and tear. How can they enjoy life while dealing with the ravages of old age?
We would like to propose an acronym to assist in dealing with this problem among seniors, and that is A.D.A.P.T.
A.
Activate the plan one step at a time to avoid confusion.
Most people who become a surrogate, or just a family member or friend acting in that capacity, can become so involved in being the implementor that they try to introduce all of the desired activities and pursuits at once. The result is usually confusion and a refusal to move forward in any direction.
For example, if a person can no longer operate a car the options available are: family members with vehicles, friends who are willing to include the person in drives and shopping, and ride services like Uber can provide great freedom if the user is careful and attentive to their surroundings. But introducing these options all in the same time period can be daunting, resulting in resistance to utilize any of them. Take every change slow and easy so nothing is confusing or upsetting.
D.
Develop a plan to deal with each issue so it will no longer be a concern. You’re right; easier said than done.
Those facing significant life-changing medical issues later in life will fare better if they have a surrogate, someone to help them address and implement a plan to deal with the changing skyline.
Here are some steps to consider:
Help the affected person to accept the things they cannot change. This is certainly difficult to implement but it can be accomplished more efficiently by introducing things to replace those that are no longer feasible. And try to implement the new activities on a daily basis so there is no time to mentally linger on how things used to be. It may be that the person affected used to play cards and, if so, reintroducing this hobby might go a long way to developing an even keel for them.
Physical activity and proper diet are two musts. Being active keeps the blood flowing and the mind attentive, and a healthy diet will ensure that the body is capable of engaging in the desired activities.
While we are busy in our respective jobs during our working years, we neglect some things that in later years may yet again become available, such as writing letters to family and friends and reading books and articles we never took time to pursue when rushing to perform our jobs.
Every effort must be made to keep the senior fully engaged in some pursuit that they enjoy and can look forward to on a daily basis.
A.
Activate the plan one step at a time to avoid confusion.
Most people who become a surrogate, or just a family member or friend acting in that capacity, can become so involved in being the implementor that they try to introduce all of the desired activities and pursuits at once. The result is usually confusion and a refusal to move forward in any direction.
For example, if a person can no longer operate a car the options available are: family members with vehicles, friends who are willing to include the person in drives and shopping, and ride services like Uber can provide great freedom if the user is careful and attentive to their surroundings. But introducing these options all in the same time period can be daunting, resulting in resistance to utilize any of them. Take every change slow and easy so nothing is confusing or upsetting.
P.
Praise the person for all their accomplishments in adopting the new way of life.
During our income-generating years we all experience various amounts of recognition, praise and commendations for things we accomplish working our way up the latter of success. Then, for some, all of that disappears with retirement, forced or planned, and the adulation is packed away in the corporate closet for the next hero to wear as their mantle of success.
T.
This can be a devastating recognition by the person feeling the impact and, therefore, it is imperative that we make a point of telling those in our care how well they are doing; and we must repeat this often to overcome the loss that would otherwise be felt. It cannot be stressed enough how important this aspect of dealing with a life change can be. This result can also be achieved by the activities we arrange for our charges. If they engage in games there are winners; if they write letters to friends, there are responses; if they cook there will be comments about the delicious meal; and if a group of friends gather the interaction provides a sense of inclusion that might otherwise be lost.
Try to incorporate new activities into the original plan to avoid the routine from becoming stale.
It is very tempting at the outset in developing a plan to counteract a life change for someone in your care to incorporate every idea you and your family and friends have or develop. That’s wonderful, but its not a good idea to run out of popcorn at the movie; similarly, its not useful to consume all the elements of your plan when there is plenty of time remaining to fill in new ideas and activities every six months or so. Keep things fresh and the senior will respond similarly.
POSTSCRIPT
It is relatively easy to write about life-change experiences for seniors but it is far more difficult to implement the measures to lighten the load for them. I have read dozens of articles on the subject by various doctors and caregivers and would acknowledge their contributions if it hadn’t been over such a long period of time and my failure to record names and sources. Needless to say, I am beholden to them for their input on the basic issues.
So, remember, no one has to wait for a holiday to enjoy their lives, even seniors with life-changing conditions.
